Learning to Love Yourself

I am going to preach about self love and how important it is. If you have struggled with self- image, self- love, self- esteem, or self-confidence and you’ve never really learned how to help yourself, here are a few ways I have done to learn how to love yourself more over time. Learning to love yourself doesn’t happen overnight. It has taken me a few months, actually, a few years, to realize that I’m better than who I think. I am who I believe I am. It has taken me a long time to know my self-worth. 

I’m going to teach you how to look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that you’re a “bad bitch” (in a good way!) The first thing you is to acknowledge to yourself that you are the only you that you ever need to be. I know it sounds cheesy, but when you can look in the mirror and say to yourself, “There are things I don’t like about myself right now and I’m going to work on  them; but at the end of the day, this is the only me that I will ever be,” you are on the right track. It shows you that you are starting to realize your self-worth. Second, think about all the qualities that make you who you are. What are the qualities that make you “you?” If you need to make a list of all the certain characteristics and qualities about yourself that make you unique, then write them all down. Look at that long list you have made and don’t sell yourself short; you know that you are an awesome person! 

These are some of the first steps I have taken to learn how to love myself more and know my worth in this world. Remember to celebrate the unique qualities about you!

Fear

What is fear? Fear is an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat. Does fear exist? Why does fear get the most of people? These are all questions I do not know the answers to and for me the Internet will not be able to answer those questions. The only person that can answer those questions are you and myself. I wish I could say I am a fearless person, I am spontaneous, and I am adventurous. To be honest I am scared a lot of the time. I never like getting in trouble because I am scared of the consequences. I can be adventurous and spontaneous sometimes but it is not like fear. Whenever I am about to do something and I am scared I feel a pain in my chest and in my stomach. It is different from all the other kinds of pain. I have been told, “You must realize that fear is not real. It is a product of thoughts you create, do not misunderstand me, danger is very real but fear is a choice!”  This quote is constantly stuck in my head and I always wonder if I did not have these collective thoughts in my head of fear would I have fear? In the past few weeks, I have gone through many situations and scenarios where fear got the most of me but I was able to pull through and complete the task. I constantly told myself I am strong and I am confident. Completing that certain task at first, fear got the best of me but I was able to push it out-of-the-way. Fear is something that lives in you forever in my opinion. In addition, the only way to get rid of it in certain scenarios is to stand your ground. You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop and look fear in the face. You must do the thing you think you cannot do. 

 

Staying Strong!

There comes a time in life where you feel trapped, you don’t know which direction to go, your mood swings are all over the place, and maybe you cry sometimes. At the start of 2020 everyone said “this is going to be the best year ever, 2020 vision.” People were planning to live their best lives and spread happiness everywhere.” Little did all human beings know that this would be one of the hardest years for many people. People have been locked up in their homes for months, thousands have died, friendships have been distanced apart. People have second-guessed what’s happening to them “why are they always sad, why do they feel lonely.” But I’m here to tell you that you’re not going through it alone. I’m lonely, I’m sad, I cry. I’ve been trapped in quarantine for five months along with many other people and I bet a lot of us are all feeling the same emotions. I am here to tell you to hold on a little longer because it’s going to get better. Each day you will rise above and you will show yourself that there is good. There is better coming. Don’t let go now because you yourself have so much to offer and I know from the bottom of my heart there is happiness waiting for you. I’ve had a rough last month. I crashed my car. Update: it’s fixed and perfectly brand new. Friendships of mine got further apart from each other. My father received double hip replacement surgery. And almost every night I’m crying myself to sleep. But I know this is just a phase, a phase of sadness. I need to know that things are going to get better and that I shouldn’t look down I should only look up. If you’re going through a hard time right now this is for you. Keep your head up high because there is happiness and a good road ahead of you. So stay strong for me. It’s not always easy, but that’s life. Be strong. Know that there are better days ahead.

 

Good Days vs Bad Days

There are good days and there are bad days. The good days put smiles on people’s faces. On a good day it’s easier to go to bed. On the good days, your attitude might be less bossy and calm with a sense of happiness. However, on the bad days that is when you realize your life as a whole. One bad thing, one small piece of something of your day can ruin everything. Us teens let the bad things get to us too easily. Us teens are still learning a fracture of who we are and how to handle the bad days. But with support systems those bad days can turn and then on those bad days you can realize who’s there for you and who isn’t. Life is hard we all know it, but it’s your job to pick yourself up in the times of struggle. It’s your job to power through the times of sadness. It’s your job to put a smile on your face. It’s your job to remember that in a bad day there’s always a tomorrow and it’s your job to remember that things will fall back into place it just takes time. So in those bad days keep your head up high try to put a smile on your face. Tell yourself if you’re having a bad day, that you have managed to get through every bad day, you’ve had, so you’ll make it through this one too. Use your struggles and frustrations today to motivate you rather than annoy you. You’re in control of the way you look at life be mindful. In the times of stress and anxiety breathe inhale and exhale and remember everything is going to be okay.

Questions

Who are you? What’s important to you? What makes you happy? What makes you sad? Why are you here today?

My name is Samantha I’m 16 and I currently live in LA.  I don’t know whats important to me. I don’t know what makes me sad I don’t know what makes me happy. I don’t know why I’m here today. You can answer these broad questions at an early age but in my opinion the answers won’t come to you very easily. These types of questions develop over time because in a four years from now you’re going to be a different person with new interests in life. I’m always asked what’s my story? I could answer that question right now based on my life currently but I know that answer is going to be different soon enough. The only question I could answer right now is what do you want to do? I want to influence and inspire people to do the right thing. I want to give advice to people who don’t know which path to take and/or if they’re stuck. I want to show teens around the world that they are not the only ones feeling like they’re trapped in a white box not knowing where to go. And I know that there are some teens out there that know what they want in life, know how to act, they know who they are, they know what they want, and they know which path to take, and I look up to those people in so many ways. But I’m going to be straight up honest with you I don’t know who I am and I’m trying to figure it out and I’m all alone. I want to be all alone because I want to be able to accomplish the things I want in life by myself. That’s what makes me powerful, sure I have family by my side and I have friends but being alone that’s confidence and that’s power. Having confidence and being brave is hard but if you “begin” and you take a “step” to what you want you can be confident and you can be brave or you can be all the other characteristic traits you want to be. Just remember, “This is your road and your road only, people can walk on it with you, but no one can walk it for you.” So go out in the world and find who you really are. Take off the mask of perfection and show the world who you are, and what you want to accomplish in life.

You are Beautiful and Unique in your Own Way

This is a small public service announcement to teens all over the world:  

I feel like I need to address this problem. Girls are comparing themselves to others and it hurts me. You are all so beautiful in so many different ways. Please don’t think you need to look a certain way to be “enough”, to fit in social media’s idea of “perfect.” I am telling you from the bottom of my heart, that you are enough. 

You are More Than

I’m more than
I’m more than
I’m more than

Body
You can’t see my body
I have more to offer than what’s under my clothes
Trust you?
Why should I trust you?
You don’t even listen when I say
NO

I’m not a dime a dozen
Oh my skin is golden
But you can’t show the whole damn world
I’m one in a billion
The only thing I’m missing
Is my worth, I hope you’re proud

Bodies
We’re more than our bodies
If you can’t accept that
Then please just go

This is a poem/ song I found. Sadly, I don’t know who wrote it but I will not take any credit for it. 

This post goes out to teen girls. Teen girls get taken advantage of too much. We girls don’t know how to act around boys. Girls get stressed, worried, and anxious when we are around someone who we think is attractive. Girls think we’re going to do whatever it takes to have that boy in our lives and some will go above and beyond to get what they want. But when going “above and beyond,” some don’t notice that they’re being taken advantage of in ways they never should be. 

We girls should be proud of what we have, we should show these young men in the world that we are more than what’s on the outside. It’s all about personality and who we are on the inside, and some boys cannot accept that reality. 

We girls are one in a million. Every single girl is different, every single girl has her own life, her own personality, style, way of living. Anyone would be the luckiest person in the world to have YOU.

GIRLS: be who you are and don’t let people take advantage of you. Make sure you’re comfortable with what you do and how you do it because in the end if you do something that you will regret it’s going to hurt like hell and you’ll never get it back. Stand your ground and tell and show the world what you want and act on it. Give the boys something to run to; show them that you are that one in a million that you truly are, both inside and out. 

Living Life as of Now

Life itself is a privilege. But to live life to the fullest- well, that is a choice. This blog goes out to all the teens that struggle having fun or not knowing what to do or where to take their next step. First thing to do in life is to take a step. Take a step to where you think you want to go. These days there is excessively much stress on teen’s, adults, and every person on this earth. People overthink, people have panic attacks, people stress, people, fail. No girl nor boy is perfect. And that’s our world we live in. But if you keep holding yourself back from what you want to do then the only one hurting yourself is you. Get up and live your life. In this past quarantine I’ve realized that I am myself stress too much and worry too much. I have people in my life telling me what to do but I’ve realized that I’m not going to be pushed around anymore I’m going to tell myself what to do and I’m going to take a step forward into the future that I want to live and I’m not going to let anyone take that away from me. Go on adventures, see the world, make experiences of a lifetime, take risks. Teens, we don’t have a lot of time to be teens so be who you want to be, do what you want to do, live how you want to live, and don’t let anyone get in the way of you living the life you want to live. 

That's a Wrap

Currently it’s just another day, another day of school, or should I say online school. This is the last week of sophomore year and if someone were to ask me how I feel about it I wouldn’t be able to answer them. Out of all my years being in private and public schools sophomore year has been the most stressful, dramatic, hurtful, and worst year of my life. I have learned so much this past year yet been through so much this past year. I went from a low GPA to almost a 4.2 GPA in just a year. I lost friends and gained friends. I got in fights and I cried. That is what made sophomore year sophomore year. I have to say I’ve never experienced this many friend problems in my life. I never went from one group, to another, to another. I never lost as many friends or gained as many friends as I did this year. In part of my mind I say it’s a good thing but on the other end there were bad things. Once again as I keep telling myself it’s weird to think that next time I step on my school campus will be when I’m in 11th grader. It’s crazy to see how much time has passed. It feels just like yesterday I was stepping onto the bright yellow school bus with my new black converse, my mom in her court outfit taking a picture of me standing on the first step of the bus on my first day of sixth grade. Now my Converse are ripped in half, my skirt is too short on me, I am not riding the bus anymore due to me getting my license, my friend problems are all over the place, and I’m trapped in my room. But I do have to say I should be giving myself props for getting through three years of middle school and two years of high school but now I get another two years of high school and I’m just wishing those will be flipped around from what I experienced this past year. That's a wrap of 10th grade. 

Pushing Negative Thinking Out of the Way

I am the CEO of not making it onto the cheer team two years in a row and only making it onto the team in eighth grade because the cheerleader coach felt bad for me. I am CEO of not making student council president my sophomore year. I am the CEO of not making commissioner sophomore year. I am the CEO of not making a leadership club incoming junior year. I am the CEO of filling out an application and getting denied by every single leader ship club possible or athletic team. The only thing left I have is my student council application which I filled out almost 2 weeks ago and I’m still waiting for an answer. If I don’t get on student council junior year my life is practically over and colleges will think I’m the most boring-ist person ever. So give me an application and I’ll fill it out and I guarantee I will not get onto whatever it is. 

My question is why do these negative thoughts run through my mind? Why do I say them out loud to myself ? Why do I feel like I’m a failure? 

I know all I have to do is keep trying and I will succeed one day. And that’s the same to you if you struggle with something in life keep trying and keep pushing and one day you’ll achieve the thing you’ve been needing or wanting. Just know “don’t wait until you’ve reached your goal to be proud of yourself. Be proud of every step you take toward reaching your goals.”

Thoreau Walden

This blog goes goes out my 10th grade English teacher from my high school and all teenagers around the world. I’m currently working on an essay for English class right now and my essay topic is "things that are needed for young people to overcome obstacles." You’re supposed to use articles and parts of books to create evidence for your topic. Along time ago in the beginning of the semester my English teacher made us read a chapter of a story from the author of Thoreau Walden. At first I read it, annotated it, and I had so much trouble understanding the deep meaning of the book. All my friends tried to explain it to me but I still could not understand it. Until my English teacher helped me understand it and a light-bulb went off in my head. The chapter of the story was telling how people in life should create a sense of structure for themselves to be able to achieve their goals in life like building a foundation for themselves. When I realized what this meant it stuck out to me so much because my blog relates to the main topic of the book. I decided to use the Walden essay as evidence for my English class research paper. Sadly, when I talk to my teacher she told me that Walden wasn’t necessarily what I was looking for in my essay and that I might have to cut it out from my essay. But she told me I don’t need to cut out Walden all the way because I could use it for my blog. And that’s exactly what I’m doing right now. Just because I cut out Walden from my essay in English class doesn’t mean I have to cut it out all the way. This particular essay really stood out to me and i want to thank my English teacher for showing me the correct path to take with this essay and showing me that it doesn’t resolve all around one chapter of a book or an essay and that there are so many resources in this world. Walden's says that building a foundation for yourself is something very important you need to learn in life which i 100% agree with. So if you’re struggling in life build a sense of structure for yourselves, go over, under, left, and  right to be able to solve your problems or to be able to achieve your goals. Do you have the dedication and determination to want to succeed in life? That is a question only you can answer. But if you do I promise you you will most certainly be able to get to the finish line.

Body Image

In seventh grade my mother told me you can have an Instagram account but you can’t have Snapchat. In seventh grade I signed up for Instagram. In eighth grade I started using Snapchat. These were a couple of the worst decisions I’ve made in my life. 

Some parents say, “sure you can have social media accounts” and others tell their kids, “you need to wait until you’re older or you may never get it.“

These past few years of being on social media has not really negatively affected me until this year. 

The one major thing that teenagers stress about is body image. Body image is one of the hardest topics for teenage girls. I think the subject of body image really hits girls when we are around 16 or 17. I am 16. One of the hardest things to look at on social media is looking at the pretty girls you go with to school with wearing bikinis. They look gorgeous, and you look at your photos or in the mirror and shame yourself for not looking as good as you think your friends do.

Every girl has these feelings at this age, I have and have these thoughts every day. It would be amazing to eat any type of food without gaining weight or having to work out. What I’ve learned recently is to be able to achieve the body you want you need to be able to work for it, and that means working out every single day and eating healthy foods. I don’t believe in a strict diet that beats you to your core because I just think it hurts you in the long run. My opinion is that you should eat whatever makes you happy. Eat healthy and make sure that whatever you put in your body is good for you. You can’t just eat healthy for the rest your life and think that your body will magically be perfect, you need to work out and be active. 

So far during this quarantine I have pushed off working out and I thought that if I just did not eat a lot I would lose weight. This has not worked. In the last week I’ve been going on runs, going on a stationary bicycle for 30 minutes, and doing ab and thigh workouts. 

I have a goal for myself. It isn’t to look a specific way or like a certain person. My goal is to feel confident in what I wear, how I wear it, and to feel healthy inside and out. My body won’t change from working out and eating healthy in just a week. I know it will take a couple of months, but I’m dedicated to doing it. 

Everybody is different in their own way and I believe that’s a good thing. Everyone should not have the same body. We should treat our bodies the way we want them to look as long as what we do is healthy and safe.

There are many quotes from famous people about body image and loving yourself. These are quotes i read to myself every single day and this is what gets me through being too self-conscious about the way I feel about how I look.

 “You have to just accept your body. You may not love it all the way, but you just have to be comfortable with it, comfortable with knowing that it is your own body.” Rihanna

“Dear Body,

No matter what strangers and loved ones say, no matter which step is in your journey, no matter what shape you are in..... I will always love you.”

This last poem is one I found a long time ago that has been in my photos of memories for a very long 

time.

“Love your body”

Look at your hands, they have pets so many cute animals and dried so many of your tears.
Look at your feet, they have walked you to some of your favorite places and walked you away from the bad ones.
Look at your belly, think of the days when it’s been full and warm with your favorite foods.
Look at your legs, they’ve held you up when you thought you weren’t strong enough to stand.
Look at your eyes, they have seen so many beautiful people.
Look at your mouth, it is told so many people that you love them.

Your body has been there for you since day one; love it because it loves you.

 

Just Some Blankness

Somethings off. I don’t know what it is and I’m really confused. I think the things that make me happy in the moment don’t bring me any joy. I don’t know if I can blame my confusion on this virus. Last week I was so happy and I thought of so many happy things in my life, and now nothing is bringing me joy.  I still have the motivation to do my work because I know that it’s due and I need to get it done but everything else is just blank to me. Maybe next week I’ll find what I’m looking for even though I don’t even know what I’m trying to look for. 

All I need to do right now is keep my head up high and think of the positive things in my life. I try to think of the things that have brought me joy in the past and make the situation I am in now one where I can find some joy in it.  At the end of the day I know everything‘s going to be OK. 

It’s just weird to think I might not be going back to school this year and the next time I’ll step on my school campus will be when I am in 11th grade. It’s crazy how fast my high school experience has gone by. I need to spend more time focusing on the “now” moments, which kind of sucks because I absolutely hate being in quarantine. I’m getting through it one week at a time and will see where it leads me. 

Realizing Things

It is Wednesday, April 23. 

Spring break has just ended and I’m back to online learning. These past few weeks I’ve noticed that online learning has changed the way I study and complete assignments. I’ve been much more dedicated to my work lately. Since I have nothing to do in the house and I’m bored all day so I decide to get all my work done right on the spot. As for quizzes and tests, I haven’t had a lot. If I have one or two I study in advance for them a lot more than I would usually do and I’ve gotten 100% on almost every single quiz and test I’ve taken, even math! To be honest, I think this online learning process has changed me for the better because of how I have improved my work habits. 

The experience of being quarantined in my house and taking online classes instead of being at school has made me appreciate much more things in life. I appreciate my family so much more for all that they do for me. Our country’s unemployment rate is 55%. Both of my parents are working. My mom is a lawyer and my dad owns his own business as a general contractor. I’m very lucky person to have two parents who are working and are dedicated to their careers during this time. I realize more now how much my parents have done for me in the past and are still doing so much for me. 

Something that I have not missed by being in quarantine are the bus rides to school. Every single day before school and after school I would take the bus because my parents couldn’t drive me to school and I didn’t have a driver’s license yet. Now I have a license and when we start back up at school I’ll be able to drive my own car. I have been waiting to be a licensed driver and not ride the bus every single day since I was in sixth grade. It will be weird not having to ride the bus every single morning and afternoon for 45 minutes. 

I am just praying that everyone can do their duty by staying inside and being safe so this world can get better and we can go back to normal daily routines.

What's Your Duty?

“she’s the type of woman who needs alone time. She feels deep, she feels even deeper. Her alone time allows her to figure out her mood, where her energy is, and how to take each step in life.” This quote really stood out to me. Last night I was in my room and I was thinking about so many things that were happening in this world right now, thinking about things that I didn’t even need to worry about. Being in this time of Quarantine I feel hard it has brought a lot of self-reflection to the table. I’ve had moments in Quarantine where I’ve just sat on my bed or sat in a chair and just looked out the window and sucked in all the peace and all the quiet and just thought. I feel this is a necessary time for lots of people right now to just think. Think about what’s happening right now where are you stand in this world,what’s your duty.  Right now sitting in my chair I know that my duty is to stay inside and protect my family from the outside world. The outside world is pretty crazy right now. Another one of my duties is school. Now for some other people there, duty might be work. Everyone has a different duty currently in this world. And I feel it’s important to just think. This is a moment to make sure that you are OK that you are in a healthy state and if you’re not in a healthy state right now which there are probably lots of people that are not in a healthy state currently try to fix that, resolve your problem see how you can come to a healthy state. Think positive and keep yourself safe.

Only a Teenager Once

“Eat pizza for breakfast, dye your hair, book the flight, don’t count calories, buy the shoes, kiss a stranger, ride with the top down, get extra guac, support your local girl gang, buy yourself flowers, eat your veggies, create something, order dessert, call your mom, wake up early, cry it out, dance till 4 AM, believe in magic, visit your grandparents, wear lipstick, don’t let boys be mean to you, smile at strangers, be spontaneous, say I love you, embrace your messy hair, be in the moment, create your own damn happiness!” 
I read this quote and I sat for a minute wondering what this was about. But once I read it out loud it became clear to me. Live your life to the fullest while you can. I feel this is a big call to teenagers in this world indicating that you’re only a teenager once and one day you’ll be an adult with kids maybe and a husband and you won’t be able to do the things you were able to do back then. It might sound crazy to live life to the fullest and do whatever you want, but make your own happiness and live in the moment. Do what your heart desires don’t let anyone push you down. Lots of teenagers struggle with trying to find happiness in this world but it’s really simple on how to find happiness because it’s right in front of you. This post goes out to all teenage girls that are afraid to try something new and live life without weight on your shoulders. Because one day you won’t be able to go back and you’ll regret what you didn’t do. So do the things that you wanna do and be who you are and create your own happiness.

My Opinion On What Life Will Be Like After the COVID-19 Virus

Right now in America, there is a global pandemic happening. Life has hit many people recently. I believe that our world we live in from now on will be much more cautious. The changes made now in markets, and stores hopefully will stay the same to better the safety of costumers. Lately we have been stuck in our homes, some of us have been on LA county lockdown. I have been realizing the greatness of nature and sunshine in the outdoors, while going on walks with family. Therefore hopefully people will start to value the sunshine, nature, and bonding with family from now on. People hopefully will be much safer for when they get sick, they might stay home instead of going to work. People might keep their hands to their selves more often. LAUSD and private schools might offer online resources for people that are homesick. My personal routines have changed in my every day life. I have always hated school and from now on, I am going to cherish every moment of it with friends and teachers. Last week I drove myself down to my high school so when school begins again I will be able to know the route to get from my house to school. While driving past school my heart stopped and I realized that I miss school with all my heart and I do call it my second home. Hopefully from now on life itself will be more sanitary and people will be much more grateful for the little things in life.

Some Weird Thinking

It is currently Wednesday, April 15 and this is about to be a pretty weird post. My whole life I’ve watched those movies of two teenagers falling in love, having those weird moments together, sometimes mysterious and learning how much they have in common. And just recently, I questioned, what does it feel like to feel loved? To have someone by your side, to have someone to kiss you and tell you that you’re beautiful and pretty? I feel as you grow up you find different parts of yourself like who you really are. This 2020 quarantine has really changed me. I changed my style and learning how to be more confident. I changed the way I work like my work habits. I’ve made goals for myself and how I’m going to achieve them. I’ve changed the way I act around friends based on the way I want them to respect me and the way that I respect them. I feel as if I’m a whole new person. I feel this way partly on how the way that I can drive on my own now. I feel like a part of me has been unlocked and that’s the part that’s been locked for 16 years which is freedom. I feel with freedom you have more confidence you can find who you truly are and with confidence just maybe you can find your soulmate. In grammar school, it used to be “oh I have a crush” it’s never been “I’m truly infatuated with them.” I wonder what life would be like if I was infatuated with someone if I had someone by my side. Of course, I have my family and my friends by my side. But what if I had someone by my side who I was truly into them and whenever I was around them butterflies would shutter in my stomach and I would blush. This is all the stuff that goes on in my head when I sleep or I am trying to go to sleep. I have to stop watching these romance movies because I’m falling into a pit here. I need to get out and show everyone who the new me is. As everyone says you’ll find true love when you find it is a process that cannot be rushed. I can’t say I believe in “true love at first sight” because I’ve never experienced it, hopefully, one day I will. Hopefully, I’ll find someone, one day that will love me for who I am like how my parents love each other for who they are. My mother was very lucky to find someone who loves her. They are living a great life together and are very happy. All teens say they want to find a boy, they want a boyfriend, but it’s not just that to me. I want butterflies in my stomach, I want to look at him with true eyes, I want someone where we laugh and look up at the stars, and it will be hard to find someone but I know I can’t rush the process. These are just dreams, things I think in my head all the time and this is just one of the subjects that runs through my mind every day.

Reflecting on the Positives and the Negitives in Life

It is currently Tuesday, April 14, 8:32 PM. I’m sitting in my bed right now reflecting on these past four weeks of online school. Spring break has just started. Lately, I have been weighing the positive and negative things in my life. 

For example, some of the positive things are I will be able to get higher than a 4.0 GPA this semester. In my educational career, I have never been able to accomplish this goal and I am very excited about this chance. From the help of my teachers and my own drive and hard work, I have been able to accomplish this from the start of the spring semester through my 10-week quarter grades (before online school began.) 

I have also actually been getting a lot closer to my family. We have had cooking nights, movie times, and walks. Something that I have also learned is how to work out and get exercise. I feel working out and getting exercise is very important for all of us due to us sitting inside most of the day. 

However, there also been some negatives of being home for many weeks unable to leave. I really do miss my friends. Luckily, I am on FaceTime with them every single night. Something that really hit me the other day was when I found out that as of a few days ago if you are found on the streets of L.A. or in a grocery store without a mask on you will be fined with $1000. It is just crazy what this world has come to. Something that also struck me like a lightning bolt was that I was at Trader Joe’s almost 3 days ago and last night at that same Trader Joe’s an employee tested positive for the COVID-19 virus.

Currently, at this time in my life, I am keeping my head held high hoping that everyone is safe. I am trying new things out in my life and trying to become a better me. I am learning new things that I never knew I was capable of doing.

I would like to share this poem my mother read to me.

This poem was written in 1869 by Kathleen O’Mara.

It was reprinted during the 1919 Pandemic. It sounds just as relevant today.

And people stayed at home

And read books

And listened

And they rested

And did exercises

And made art and played

And learned new ways of being

And stopped and listened

More deeply

Someone meditated, someone prayed

Someone met their shadow

And people began to think differently

And people healed.

And in the absence of people who

Lived in ignorant ways

Dangerous, meaningless and heartless,

The earth also began to heal

And when the danger ended and

People found themselves

They grieved for the dead

And made new choices

And dreamed of new visions

And created new ways of living

And completely healed the earth

Just as they were healed.

Self- Conscious

What is being self-conscious? Feeling undo awareness of oneself, one’s appearance, or one’s actions.

I feel growing up every single teenager goes through being self-conscious. I’m in that stage, I’m 16 and I’m 100% self-conscious.  To be honest I hate being self-conscious. Every morning in the mirror, and look at myself and I point out all my flaws. I go to school knowing what I pointed out on my body in the mirror and it breaks my heart.  I go to the mall with friends and if I walk around and see people looking at me I hold my stomach in. Whenever someone is staring at me I automatically think they’re pointing out all the flaws on my body, but really it’s just my head getting to me. 

I wish I could be totally confident and say to myself my body is perfect, my legs are the perfect shape , I love my face, and my hair is gorgeous (which people tell me all the time and I don’t believe them.) I can’t say all these compliments to myself that because I’m a teenager and at times I disagree with it it. I’m currently learning how to love my body and love who I am.

One of my teachers told me the following: everyone is different, everyone has a different body, everyone eats different foods, everyone lives differently, everyone is unique. All human beings weren’t made out to be the same, if everyone was the same it would be completely boring. Everyone is their own person and unique in their own way. 

YOU, those reading my post, are unique and are beautiful in your own way! 

Quote of the day: 

You are worthy.

You are capable.

You are beautiful.

Book the ticket.

Write the book.

Create the dream.

Celebrate yourself.

Rule your Queendom!

Much love: Seriously Samantha <3

Friends... What are Friends?

Friends....What are friends? 
Friends don’t care if you’re being an ass, what you look like, what car you drive, if your family is crazy or not, if you’re rich or poor, or what you weigh. Your conversations will pick up where they left off, even if months have passed by. They will be there for you when you need them the most, and despite your faults, will love you with all their heart and cherish the times spent with you.

Fake friends.... What are fake friends? 
Fake friends can sit with you at lunch, they will talk to you, they’ll be around you with other friends. When it comes down to you struggling and you being in a stage where you need other people to help you, those fake friends will disappear. When you’re back in your happy moment, they will reappear. Those are fake friends. 

This past year has been one of the hardest years socially. I’ve realized who my fake friends are and who are my real friends. I sat with a new friend group this year. I thought that they would be fun and I thought they would bring me joy. Throughout my time sitting with them, I realized they never brought me joy. I was never happy around them at lunch. We never had any conversations, or they would have their own and leave me out. They would hang out and not invite me; group chats would be made and I wouldn’t be on them. When times of sadness came around, they seemed like they cared but they really didn’t and I felt it. 

Just this past week, I decided to sit with one of my other friends for lunch to see how it would go. Turns out I had a full conversation with a group of people I had not hung out with before. I laughed and I smiled, which seems like it’s been forever since I did at lunchtime. The next day I was actually looking forward to lunch, which I never usually did. This new group of people I sit with with bring me joy. I don’t know how they brought me joy so quickly, but they did.

This idea has been stuck in my mind for a long time and I want to share it with you. It’s much easier to not know things. Sometimes things change and friends leave. Life doesn’t stop for anybody. I want to laugh, maybe get mad, or even shrug at how strange everyone was around me, even at myself. Every person has to live for his or her own life and make the choice to share it with other people. You can’t just sit there and put everyone’s life ahead of yours, you just can’t. You have to do things for you.

I’m going to do what I want to do for myself. I’m going to be who I really am, and I’m going to figure out what that means to me. We can chose to feel bad and blame people for what they did or didn’t do, or what they didn’t know about how we felt inside. 

I guess there could always be someone to blame. Maybe it’s good to put things in perspective, but sometimes I think that the only perspective is to really be in the moment. It is OK to feel things. I was really there, and that was enough to make me feel infinite. I feel infinite.

Find the people in life that make you happy in high school. So many people think social status is the only thing that matters, but let me tell you, it isn’t. Hang out with people who you choose hang out with, people who make you happy and make you laugh. I thought I could only hang around people who are well-known in the school so I could be well-known myself. But in the end, I figured out that it doesn’t matter where they stand or were you stand in the world of social status, it matters if you’re happy and a good person. So find the people who make you happy!

Quote of the day:
Be with people who know your worth. You don’t need too many people in your life to be happy, just a few real ones who appreciate you for who you are! 

Much love: Seriously Samantha

My Opinion on Academics

This blog goes out to all the people who are struggling with academics right now and really don’t know which path to take. This is my story on academics! All of middle school I did pretty well with my academics I got onto the honor roll almost every single semester and every single year of middle school I did great, I miss middle school, I loved it so much! 

High school is 100% different. Last year when I was in ninth grade I did really really well I got onto the honor roll both semesters and I was really proud of myself but, I didn’t work really hard both semesters. I think I could’ve tried a lot harder.This current year at the beginning of the semester I thought that I could take 10th grade exactly the same way I tackled ninth-grade. I thought I wouldn’t have to study A great deal, and all I needed to do is complete my homework, let’s just say that didn’t work out.

 So far in my academic career ,10th grade has been one of the hardest years for me I thought 10th grade would be a breeze, turns out it is the hardest thing ever. I am up all night nonstop learning how to study for tests and doing homework, and yes sometimes I do procrastinate. If I could wish for one thing I would wish I would not procrastinate. If I had to give someone one piece of advice for 10th grade it would be get all your work done the night it is assigned, speak with all your teachers and make sure you’re on the right path to success. 

The first semester of ninth-grade was a little challenging for me because I didn’t understand what I was able to do and how to do it. This 2nd semester of 10th grade semester I finally understand what I need to do to be able to accomplish and get onto the honor roll. As much as there are other problems going on in my life, academics are always the number thing on my list. I still have a long time till college about two years and I know I’m only in 10th grade but I’ve learned a lot this year about learning the correct way to study. Even today I am still learning how I can study for tests and do certain homework assignments and I’ll be finding out the correct way to do these things for the rest of my life. All You need to do is try your hardest and make sure you’re taking the path you want to take.Where are you are right now, build a foundation for yourself so you can achieve your goals. Live life simply and don’t overthink it if you overthink too many things your life will be full of anxiety, and trust me that’s not mentally healthy. Learn new things each day and apply it to your goal. Take it day by day and step-by-step and then with the foundation you built you’ll be able to achieve whatever you put your mind to.

Quote of the day: Education is the most powerful weapon that you can use to change the world with!

Much love: seriously Samantha

Im Back!!

To be quite honest I don’t know how to start this blog let’s just start off by saying I’m back and I am planning to stay back. First off I started this blog around four years ago and it is now four years I am 16, I’m in 10th grade, and life is hittin me hard currently. I know it might be weird for you ,you’re probably wondering after four years she comes back what happened? There’s so much that is happened I don’t think I can explain it in one blog and that’s why I have so much more to come. My current goal is to tell every single lady and woman on this earth how powerful they are and that nothing can knock you down. I want to show people what life is really like and what high school is really like and what being a teenager girl is really like. I’m not gonna lie and say life is great and it’s amazing and everything is perfect, if it is then I’ll tell you that but on this blog everything that comes out of my mouth is 100% true. Hopefully I can get a lot more viewers to read my posts because my goal is to inspire every single teenager and woman in this world to believe in themselves and have self confidence . You thought it was the end but this is just the beginning welcome back! If you keep reading you’re in for a great adventure!

Quote of the day:  Today i close the door to the future, take a deep breath, step on through and start a new chapter in my life. This is the start of my new chapter!


 This was me in 2015 when i first started my blog!

                 

This is me currently in 2020!

I will be writing every day from now on so stay tuned! Much Love: Seriously Samantha