Friends... What are Friends?

Friends....What are friends? 
Friends don’t care if you’re being an ass, what you look like, what car you drive, if your family is crazy or not, if you’re rich or poor, or what you weigh. Your conversations will pick up where they left off, even if months have passed by. They will be there for you when you need them the most, and despite your faults, will love you with all their heart and cherish the times spent with you.

Fake friends.... What are fake friends? 
Fake friends can sit with you at lunch, they will talk to you, they’ll be around you with other friends. When it comes down to you struggling and you being in a stage where you need other people to help you, those fake friends will disappear. When you’re back in your happy moment, they will reappear. Those are fake friends. 

This past year has been one of the hardest years socially. I’ve realized who my fake friends are and who are my real friends. I sat with a new friend group this year. I thought that they would be fun and I thought they would bring me joy. Throughout my time sitting with them, I realized they never brought me joy. I was never happy around them at lunch. We never had any conversations, or they would have their own and leave me out. They would hang out and not invite me; group chats would be made and I wouldn’t be on them. When times of sadness came around, they seemed like they cared but they really didn’t and I felt it. 

Just this past week, I decided to sit with one of my other friends for lunch to see how it would go. Turns out I had a full conversation with a group of people I had not hung out with before. I laughed and I smiled, which seems like it’s been forever since I did at lunchtime. The next day I was actually looking forward to lunch, which I never usually did. This new group of people I sit with with bring me joy. I don’t know how they brought me joy so quickly, but they did.

This idea has been stuck in my mind for a long time and I want to share it with you. It’s much easier to not know things. Sometimes things change and friends leave. Life doesn’t stop for anybody. I want to laugh, maybe get mad, or even shrug at how strange everyone was around me, even at myself. Every person has to live for his or her own life and make the choice to share it with other people. You can’t just sit there and put everyone’s life ahead of yours, you just can’t. You have to do things for you.

I’m going to do what I want to do for myself. I’m going to be who I really am, and I’m going to figure out what that means to me. We can chose to feel bad and blame people for what they did or didn’t do, or what they didn’t know about how we felt inside. 

I guess there could always be someone to blame. Maybe it’s good to put things in perspective, but sometimes I think that the only perspective is to really be in the moment. It is OK to feel things. I was really there, and that was enough to make me feel infinite. I feel infinite.

Find the people in life that make you happy in high school. So many people think social status is the only thing that matters, but let me tell you, it isn’t. Hang out with people who you choose hang out with, people who make you happy and make you laugh. I thought I could only hang around people who are well-known in the school so I could be well-known myself. But in the end, I figured out that it doesn’t matter where they stand or were you stand in the world of social status, it matters if you’re happy and a good person. So find the people who make you happy!

Quote of the day:
Be with people who know your worth. You don’t need too many people in your life to be happy, just a few real ones who appreciate you for who you are! 

Much love: Seriously Samantha