New Years Eve - 180 Days!!!

OMG! It is New Years Eve and it is already 180 days of me taking growth hormone therapy shots.

I feel the same since I started; but if I think about it, I have grown to become more confident in myself.  For example, when I went to the doctor to take my flu shot, the nurse gave me the shot and I did not feel a thing.  I also do not have a fear of blood because I usually see a little bit of blood after I take my shots each night.  I have grown confident in being able to handle giving myself my own shots every night and know that I am a strong person who believes in herself and can make her goals a reality.

I have also grown confident in others.  I have so much support from my family and friends who I did not know would be there to be there for me.  I could not do this without you all.  Thank you being there for me while I have been through hard times. 

I would like to give a big shout out to my Auntie Mara.  I have gotten so much closer to her since I started winter break.  When my dad was sent to the hospital I spent 2 days with her and she has helped me so much along with talking about many other things I have been stressed about in my life.  I feel so comfortable next to her; I can talk to her about anything.  I love her so much.  Thank you Auntie Mara.

I also want to thank my mom for being so close to me and being there for me every day I take my shots.  I love you more than a bee loves a rose.

I am going to spend time with my dad now who is sick in bed.  He needs my support just like he supports me every day.

I'm Sorry

I am so sorry that I have not written on my blog in a while.  I have been SO BUSY lately with school, taking finals, and now I go back to school on Monday.  I am working on time management so I can fit all the things I want to do in my life.

It has been a really hard for me.  I was in Mexico on vacation and my dad got terribly sick.  When we came back from our trip he was sent to the hospital. He returned home from the hospital about 3 days ago. My father has shingles in his ear and that is very rare.  When I think about "rare" I think about someone very special.  My dad is so special to me and I care so much about him.  The night before he went to the hospital I took care of him.  I brought him tissues, toast, a plastic bag so he could throw up, I brought him blankets and helped him move around.

I have helped my dad so much that I want to work as a doctor at Children's Hospital when I am an adult and help kids with cancer, heart problems, missing legs or arms because they had an accident or were born without them, and maybe even growth hormone deficiency!

Remember that it is important to help others who need your help. Be respectful, responsible, and be safe.

Wishing you a Happy New Year!

Seeing the Doctor - ANOTHER INCH!

On Friday I went to my endocrinologist appointment which I go to every 2 months to check my height and weight.  I grew ANOTHER INCH! I don't feel much of a difference, but I am happy about it.

I asked my doctor, "Are you an endocrinologist because you are short or is it because you want to help people?"  He told me that he likes to help kids and I think that is very cool.

I don't feel that tall yet; but I know the doctor's office is measuring my height and weight properly.  I am a little worried that I might not get to be 5'3", which is about the height I am supposed to be if I did not have growth hormone deficiency.

What if I am so short in college? People might laugh at me because I am really short. I know I have many years to go before I am in college, but I still get worried.

My mom taught me to stand up for myself, and if people bully me about my height I do not have to be afraid.  I am who I am, and if that's means being short, I am fine with that.

Ashley and I

Today is a huge day for me!

I have a big performance later tonight at school and I am really excited.

Right now a college student is here at my house to interview me. She is a broadcast journalism major at USC and for her final she picked me, the Awesome Samantha, to interview!

I think it is so cool that someone in college has been inspired by me.

Don't be shy, don't be scared. You are who you are and don't change it.

If you are scared to be on camera, don't be.  Get over it.

Sick

Today I went home early from school because I did not feel well.  I have a little bit of a head cold right now and my throat is bothering me.  I can't smell anything.  I went to CVS today to pick up some honey and there were some perfumes which said "try me."  I tried them and I could not smell the scent. I am so tired even though I took a 3 hour nap today.  I hope I will feel better by tomorrow so I can sing at our choir's performance...

Sweet Sleepy Samantha

One of the symptoms of having growth hormone deficiency is excessive tiredness and the need to sleep.

Samantha has always been a good sleeper since she was about 6 months old. She suffered from colic as an infant; however, once she was able to sleep through the night she did so with ease. Samantha has slept routinely for 10 hours per night for years, well prior to us discovering she had growth hormone deficiency. She will take a nap in the afternoon from 1-3 hours if she is able to on the weekends. Clearly, Samantha's body needs the rest, how growth hormone deficiency is the cause I don't know.

On most evenings Samantha recalls the need to take her medication and if not either her father it I do. Last night Samantha fell asleep studying for an exam and did t take her shot. About 15 minutes after she fell asleep her father reminded me. Instead of waking her up, I prepared her shot and brought it to her bedroom. Samantha was fast asleep. I didn't wake her and instead administered her shot in her upper arm; hoping she wouldn't move. As I inserted the needle in her arm, Samantha's eyes remained closed. She furrowed her eyebrows slightly, showing me that she did feel something while she was asleep; however she never fully woke up.

This experience showed me that Samantha's body, mind, and spirit, even while asleep, is committed to her treatment. Most children I would imagine would awaken and scream or become scared and cry. Not Samantha. This isn't the first time I've given her medication to her while she was asleep; however it's been a while since I have and I was unsure if she would awaken. I didn't see her eyes open.

For me, this is nothing short of amazing. For others reading this, one may find it mundane. If you find yourself to have the opportunity to see a child who needs to take medication daily by injection, watch them. You will be utterly amazed at their inner strength; it is far greater than ours in many ways.

School Assignment

Yesterday I was in my Literature class and we were placed into groups to do a project. We are creating a video "trailer" for a book we just finished reading called "Tuck Everlasting."

Our teacher came up to our group and said, "Samantha I think you should play Winnie (a main character who is a young girl about my age.)". I said, "Why, because I am short?" She replied, "No, because you are smart."

I liked her answer.

Growth Hormone Therapy Information

 

Growth Hormone Therapy Helps the Bones Grow and Become Stronger

                                      

                      The Pituitary Gland Needs Help from Growth Hormone Therapy to Work Properly

150 Days - Not so Bad?

Today marks 150 days of growth hormone therapy shots.

Tonight began just like any other; I arrived home from work to find Samantha finishing her homework. Samantha informed me that although she had completed most of her work, she wanted to show me a PowerPoint presentation she was responsible for presenting later in the week. We talked about her day while I tidied up the kitchen and thereafter she showed me her presentation. Samantha did a wonderful job, and together we discussed what minor changes she wanted to make in order to finalize it.

At about 8:30pm, I told Samantha that it was time for her to take her shot, and in response I received a slight rolling of the eyes and a reluctant "ok" because I was interrupting her end of the day "downtime" of watching a television show. She shuffled downstairs and into the kitchen where she quickly gathered the usual items, 2 alcohol wipes and one needle, while I removed her medication from the refrigerator. Samantha cleaned the top of the medication pen, cleaned it with an alcohol wipe, and screwed on the needle. She said "I want to do my shot tonight" and searched for a place in her abdominal area to administer it. Samantha knows she can't give herself a shot on a location where she has a bruise or recent mark because the shots are to be given in different locations as to not cause skin depressions from placing the needle on the same location on consecutive nights. Despite such, she looked straight at the only bruise she had on her stomach and looked at me as if she was going to administer her shot in exactly that same place. I said "Samantha give me a break."  She knows better - her actions showed me her frustration that yet again she was taking her medication for what seemed to be the thousandth time.

Samantha selected another location, pinched the skin on her abdomen, and began to pull the needle close to her skin. As always, she hesitated for about 3 seconds before puncturing the skin, pushing the pen's dispensary button for the medication to be inserted, waited 5 seconds with the needle in her skin to ensure all the medication had been released into her skin, and removed the needle.

The reason why she hesitates before putting the needle in her skin is that every single day right before she takes her shot she becomes nauseous for a fleeting moment. I don't blame her.

How many children who are 11 years old self-administer injections upon themselves? I see her "battle wounds" and I still tear up. One would think I would be used to seeing bruises less than the size of a dime on my daughter's stomach; however I don't. On the weekends Samantha usually asks me to give her the shots in her arm to give her stomach time to heal from a couple remaining bruises from the week. The bruising truly is slight and they generally disappear within a few days; however each time I see a bruise, no matter whether it is on her arm or stomach, I wince.

Samantha is such a brave child who looks at fear right in the face and tackles it head-on. She has done so with her academics as well. I am not surprised that this experience has reminded her that if she can endure this daily routine and suffer with the side effects, both physical and emotional, she can "power through" studying for her first set of final exams in 2 weeks.

I wish I had the confidence and enthusiasm Samantha has about herself and life when I was 11, or even now at the age of 42. I utterly admire her determination and positive attitude. She is the one who keeps me moving forward with her growth hormone therapy, not the reverse.

I love you Samantha and have no idea how many people you inspire, including me.

With so much love and appreciation for you being "you",

Mom

Growth Hormone Deficiency Theories (from a mom, who is not a Scientist or Physician)

                                  
Although there are no studies to support my theories, I firmly believe:

1) Growth Hormone Deficiency can be a condition which is passed down genetically despite scientific studies stating it isn't. There are an insufficient amount of studies completed with large groups to rule out a genetic correlation.

2) There should be studies to determine if there is a correlation between intro-uterine growth retardation and growth hormone deficiency.  I was diagnosed with intro-uterine growth retardation with both my children at approximately 24 weeks, was placed on bed-rest, and was induced into labor with both children - Samantha at 38 weeks and her younger brother at 37 weeks. At the present time, there are no scientific studies of which I am aware which have ruled out this connection.

1 in 3480 children have this condition and I'm confident it is much more prevalent than the medical community is aware of at the present time. In my humble opinion:

1) the testing is expensive and time consuming,

2) one has to have a pediatrician recognize possible symptoms and recommend testing,

3) payment of medication is cost prohibitive if a person does not have decent medical insurance, and

4) insurance companies resist paying for the medication because they see it as "elective" instead of truly necessary.

I can only imagine how many children are in the world who could benefit from treatment, for treatment is not necessarily solely to increase one's height. I hope that Samantha can make a difference in the lives of others as she is simultaneously making a difference in hers, and in turn, mine.

Disclosure: The information above is personal opinion only and should not be considered medical or legal advice, nor is supported by any medical research studies or physicians.

Day 140 (from Mom)

                             
When Samantha was logging her daily dose treatment tonight she exclaimed "today is 140 days!"  Although I feel tonight is a milestone for her, she told me "no, 150 days will be."  Samantha has made this process simply part of her daily routine and I am in awe of her.

When we first began investigating whether growth hormone therapy was right for Samantha, I was worried about the physical issues; how her body would respond, would she be sick, what unknown long-term effects were possibly looming in her future, and how would she take the medication on a daily basis for an unknown period of time.

Now that we have seen that Samantha does not appear to have any negative physical responses to the treatment, I think often of how Samantha feels about taking growth hormone therapy: what if it doesn't work as she wants it to, and what social stigmas are and will there be because Samantha has insisted on being vocal about her journey?

Her blog and talking/writing about it is her choice, and I support her strength, enthusiasm and drive. Samantha is coping phenomenally well and I feel it's in part because she is so open about her experience. We have friends or family get-togethers at our home and she wants to show her friends and mine how she can self-administer her shots. It gives her the motivation to keep on fighting the good fight.

Samantha's experience is one she shares because Samantha wants both herself and I to be a source of support for others at a time when it would have been unbelievably helpful to have known another child to explain the process and support Samantha. We, as parents, need support as well. I wish I had a parent I knew who had gone through this experience to inform me, even at a minimum, that everything would work out and not to doubt myself one bit in agreeing to allow Samantha to begin growth hormone therapy. Samantha wants to do more; she wants to hold another child's hand through the process, even if that is done electronically.

I look back at the last 140 days and think how easy much of the process has been.  I look towards the future and can't imagine watching Samantha take nightly shots for possibly another 2 years.

Challenging experiences are the same ones which make us better people and more appreciative of the precious gifts life has to offer so long as we take the time to open our eyes and look at what we can learn from them.