As I reflect upon the last year, I realize that Samantha's condition of Growth Hormone Deficiency has become both "normalized" in her life and at the same time affects her life daily in ways I do and do not fully understand.
Samantha has needed more sleep over the last few months than ever before. I think it is due to her body working incredibly hard to grow and is worn out by the end of the afternoon. By 5-6pm Samantha has little energy left and that is the same time when she finishes her homework after soccer practices and games which are 4x per week during soccer season. When studying for finals just 2 weeks ago, I found Samantha on many nights asleep in bed with her computer on her lap well before her usual bedtime. It is not uncommon for children 12-13 years old to go to bed at 9 or even 10pm. From the time she arrives home at 6-7pm to the time she goes to bed is spent studying or completing homework assignments. Generally she is in bed by 9pm; however the ideal time would be an hour prior. What 12/13 year old goes to bed at 8pm? Samantha (when she can.)
How do you choose between studying for exams and going to sleep because your body cannot sustain another moment of being awake? By the time finals came around I decided that it was more important for Samantha to sleep than to continue studying with a brain which had little brain-power left. Her bones and brain will thank me later for allowing her to receive now the sleep she desperately needs. Samantha grows when she sleeps; we all do. Samantha's body is working harder than the average teen to hopefully achieve the same result of what her natural physical height would be if her pituitary glad was functioning properly.
This past semester of 7th grade my heart sank when Samantha came home on a few occasions stating "I fell asleep on the bus ride home." For Samantha, this was normal. Her body was tired; she fell asleep. When asked how she knew to get off the bus at her stop she would tell me that her friends kept an eye on her and would wake her up if she dozed off for a few minutes on the ride home.
Middle school is a time where being "part of the group" is something teens seek to attain. Although Samantha certainly wants to be accepted and liked just as anyone else would, she isn't afraid to be herself even if that happens to be different from her peers. Samantha is a loving and incredibly caring and devoted person to her family and friends. Contrary to what I had expected, Samantha's friends don't make insensitive comments about her treatment - her close friends know all about it and that this is her reality. What is incredibly heart-warming is that her friends don't say a negative word to her about her condition. She is just like any other kid who happens to take daily injections of medication to treat a condition from which only 1 in 3,800 children suffer from in the United States. How wonderful.
As her mother I am saddened that Samantha needs to take medication which can only be administered by injection. It hurts to be pricked by a needle every single night to self-inject medication into her body for a year and a half (and counting.) Do we really know every single very rare side effect of the medication and the consequences which would follow? No. What we do know is that the medication has been studied and used for decades and that countless children and teens have greatly benefited from it if they are candidates without negative long-term side effects.
I am simultaneously incredibly thankful and appreciative that her father and I can provide Samantha with the gift of growth which would otherwise not be an option for her had we not been determined to offer her every opportunity to become the height she would be but-for having growth hormone deficiency.
We all suffer from challenges in our lives. Those who prevail are ones who utilize them as opportunities for understanding more about themselves and learning how to grow from these experiences. Samantha sees her cup as half-full; never half-empty.
Samantha, I love you and admire you. Keep up the amazing work you are doing to raise awareness about Growth Hormone Deficiency and celebrating the differences in others!
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